The next day, after davening, the chassidim went up to Moshele the water carrier and said, “The Rebbe wants to see you.” Moishele came before the Rebbe, and he began to cry bitterly. He said, if ‘Rebbe, I’ll never do it again. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” He was crying. The Rebbe said, “Listen, Moishele, just tell us what you did.”

Now, I always tell my friends that basically we Jews are not so much into drinking. But, in every city there is one Jew who drinks for all in that city. Then, there is some kind of higher drunkard, who drinks for the Jews of that country. And then, there are some lamed vov drunkards who drink for all the Jews of that generation. And then, there are some drunkards who drink for all the Jews from Avraham Aveinu until Mashiach. Anyway, this Moishe, the drunkard, was a lamed vovnick. His greatest joy in life was drinking. The saddest thing is, on Pesach you can’t drink whiskey. So, he had a tremendous idea. He’ll stay up the whole night, erev Pesach, and he’ll be drunk for the rest of Pesach, he’ll be drunk right thru. Anyway, he drank, and even a drunkard who is a religious Jew knows that ten minutes after nine, on Pesach, you stop. He stopped exactly, and he was out.

Seder night, his wife came to wake him up and said, “Moshele, it’s really not fair. Every Jew has a Seder. Every house has a Seder. We have little children, and we don’t have a Seder. So what’s going on here?” And, he said, “By then, did I regret that I drank so much at night. Did I regret it! I would have done anything not to be drunk. But I couldn’t help it. I said, ‘Please wake me up in an hour. I just can’t get it together yet.’ Anyway, my wife kept waking me up every hour, every half hour. Then, suddenly, she came to me and said, ‘Moishele, in five minutes, five minutes, it’s gone. You didn’t have anything and the children are waiting.’ “Gevalt”. he said, “was I broken. Here, my children are so holy and I am such a lousy father, I didn’t even give them a Seder. So, I said to my wife, ‘Please, call my children.’ She called the children in and I said to them, ‘Please, sit very close to me on my bed. I have to talk to you. I want you to know, children, that I am so sorry that I drank. I am so sorry that I am a drunkard. But, I want you to know that if my drinking can make me not have a Seder with you, then it’s not worth it.’ So, I said to my children, ‘I swear to you, Seder night, tonight, that I’ll never drink again. But, right now, it’s Seder night, I am so sorry, we didn’t eat matza, we didn’t eat maror. But, let me just tell you the Pesach story, in a nutshell.’”

Moishele said to the Rebbe, “You know, I was still drunk. But, I tried my best. I said, ‘Children, I want you to know that G-d created heaven and earth in seven days. And, I want you to know that Adam was thrown out of Paradise the first day. Then everything went downhill. There was a flood, there was a tower of Babylon; that was as much as I knew. Then came Avraham. He began fixing the world again. Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaacov and his twelve holy sons. Then Pharaoh made slaves out of us, and tonight, G-d took us out from Egypt. And, I said, children, I want you to swear to me right now, that you’ll always know that the same G-d who took us out from Egypt is still alive. It’s the same G-d. Whenever a Jew cries to G-d, G-d always hears our prayers and takes us out from all our troubles.’”

“Rebbe, I’m so sorry. I couldn’t say anything more because I was still drunk. I turned over and I fell asleep again.”

So the heilege (holy) Reb Tzvi Elimelech was crying bitter tears. He said to his chassidim, “Did you hear that? Did you hear that? I wish that one time in my life, I should be privileged to give over Yiddishkeit to my children, the way Moishele the water carrier gave it over to his children Seder night.” Gevalt.

There is a strong Alexandera Torah. It is very deep and so important for us today. The Holy Alexandera asks, “Why doesn’t the Seder begin right away with questions? The children could ask questions and then we would answer.” He answers that there are certain things which are s-o holy – don’t ask questions. Just take them the way they are. There are certain things in life you have no right to ask about because if you ask, you degrade them, you profane them. So, he says, when it comes to kadesh (kiddush), don’t ask. Urechatz (washing the hands), don’t ask. Carpas (vegetables), don’t ask. Magid (saying the Hagadah), then – you can ask. And, he says, the world is analyzing everything in the world, and they don’t know when to stop. They are destroying everything holy, by asking questions about things one shouldn’t ask.

It’s so clear to me that we adults analyze everything our children say. Was it clever, was it good, was it stupid? Then, the child is likely to say, I don’t want to talk to you. You destroy everything I say. But, Seder night, our children see that we know when to stop. We don’t tear everything apart. Out children say, Okay, I want to ask you a question. Don’t analyze it.

The first fixing, when you come out into freedom is, leave things whole. Imagine, if I tell a girl, I love you so much and she starts analyzing, how do you love me, when do you love me? Who wants to talk to her again? She can ask me what my name is, who my father is, what am I doing? But, certain things, don’t ask, don’t question. I always think that the book, “Why I am a Jew” is a real exile book. What do you mean, why am I a Jew? Don’t ask questions. Why do you love Israel? Don’t ask. Don’t touch it. Psychology, which analyzes everything and pulls everything apart has not fixed the world yet. The world is still broken.

When G-d took us out of Egypt, the first thing was, leave things as they are. Later, you can ask. At a certain point, you can ask. And, even while you are asking, leave a little bit of privacy. There are certain inner depths that you don’t ask about.

I’m sure it’s clear to you that our children ask the deepest questions and the truth is that we don’t have the answers. You can read the entire Haggadah, but the questions are still questions.

When somebody asks me a question and I answer, then basically our relationship is over. But, if someone asks me a question and I say, you know, I have the same question, let’s make the question even deeper, then we become so close to each other.

I have a feeling that when Eliyahu HaNavi (Elijah the Prophet) comes in “Tishbi Yitareitz Kushiot Ubaayot (He will answer all questions)”, he doesn’t say anything. He walks into the Seder and he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t answer. Suddenly, the question is so deep, maybe it doesn’t need an answer.

We lose our children because we tell them we have the answers to everything. our children know that it’s not true. They don’t want to talk to us. Seder night, I tell my children, so, I’m a few years older than you. You think that I know more? Maybe I know the story a little bit longer, but, I don’t know the answer. I don’t know the answer.

Then, our children feel so close to us. So close.

Brooklyn, 5745

Edited from Connections Magazine Vol 1 No 2

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Rabbi Israel Danziger,  the son of Rabbi Avrohom Menachem Dancyger (1921-2005), son of Rabbi Yehudah Moshe Tyberg-Dancyger (1892-1973) the author of Emunas Moshe.  Rabbi Israel Danziger is the present Alexanderer Rebbe of Bnei Brak, Israel (wearing a Streimal)